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November 28, 2005

You Know Me. I'm a Denizen of the House of Five Trees

EXHAUSTED. I mean....wow. These days get longer and longer and I love it. I love working like this. On my own steam, up early, driving hard, rest when I need to. Began pretty early, don't know when. 0530? 0600? Just finishing up now. It's 1930. EXHAUSTED. Seriously, i feel sedated, I'm so wiped out. As soon as I printed out today's pages, I felt this exhaustion just flood me. I must have been keeping it at bay until I was done.

Wrote two chapters today. Which worked out to be 14 pages, I think. Went back through, too, added some things. Don't really even want to hint at what's being written. It's too much in flux, I"m juggling. Has to all fall in place just right. But not the first time, must remember that. I can move stuff around, if need be. But anyway. Trying to talk myself out of being obsessive in my drive to create the perfect work is just like trying to actually create the perfect work. Never gonna happen, but you can hardly help yourself from trying. Am I making sense anymore? I think not a bit.

Now I'm at the point where I get up as soon as my eyes open (before dawn), and push until I am no longer able to think, literally. Which is right about now. It feels good. Sometimes the only way to transcend yourself is to shove your comfort out the door, and yourself right outside of your boundaries. Put your dream in overdrive.

Herm bought me a foldy-box to keep the manuscript in. Bad boy is at 168 pages, just text.

Looking forward to what tomorrow brings.

joaquín ramón herrera writes for children, adults, and other humans found elsewhere in the continuum of development. He is also an illustrator, musician, and surprise protagonist. If you have found his glasses, wallet, or keys, please contact him here.

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